Marriage is one of the oldest human institution that has kept our society functioning. Often the idea of a happy and fulfilling life is incomplete without the idea of marriage. However, like all other relationships, it requires constant effort to be happy in a marriage, and likewise smallest of the mistakes can make your marriage living hell. Here are 12 mistakes that are destroying your marriage:
10.

Sometimes your partner will need space to clear their thoughts. Maybe it’s a tough decision at work, something from their past is haunting them or they just want to relax, you should give them space. You should avoid making your partner the center of your universe and expect their universe to revolve around you too.
Not giving them and sometimes taking it personally can indicate that you don’t truly understand them and this could cause problems in the long run. Another aspect of giving them space is respecting their privacy. You should be able to trust your partner enough that you don’t have to check their phones. Reading their private messages, or being too intrusive can also lead to problems in a marriage.
9.

We are humans who are bound to make mistakes at one point or another especially in a relationship. By focusing on our partner’s mistakes repeatedly, we are training our brain to look for them. In psychology, this is known as selective perception.
Since, there is so much going on in our environment, our brain processes the information or stimuli we are looking for or have trained our brain to look for unconsciously. Instead try to ignore the little mistakes and look at the brighter side. Try to look for the good things your partner is trying to do for you.
8.

If you begin to doubt the intentions of your partner, or at any point you feel like you’ve lost trust, you are committing one of the biggest mistakes in a marriage. Trust is the foundation of all relationships and without trust you cannot have a happy marriage.
Once the foundation of trust gets rusty, you would very quickly start doubting your partner’s intentions. This would result in both partners feeling like they’re walking on egg shells and the marriage will most likely go downhill from there.
7.

Conflict is inevitable part of every relationship. In fact, a moderate amount of constructive conflict helps to better most relationships, whether it be at work or in a marriage. However, a conflict is constructive when you can reach a resolution. Often reaching a resolution requires you to think rationally.
However, in a heated argument, it’s easier to blame the other person if you do not have rules or an outline to how you will resolve the conflict. Most couples ignore this which result in a lot of conflicts and distress especially in the first year of marriage when you’re trying to understand each other as husband and wife.
Many couples set simple rules or strategies like resolving every issue before going to bed each night. While others prefer to sleep over a conflict to avoid giving harsh words and hurting each other’s feeling. The point being that it’s extremely important to acknowledge conflicts and devise a healthy resolution strategy.
6.

A lot of issues would resolve if we just stopped blaming each other and start taking responsibility. Learn to put your ego aside and admit your mistakes. Another mistake people make in marriages is not apologizing when it is their mistake and letting their egos get better of them. Instead if it’s your mistake, apologize politely and try to make it up to them.
5.

Today the media exposes us to such fantasies like the damsel in distress where all the problems are solved when your prince charming walks through the door. Similarly, a lot movies portray that love can ‘fix’ a disturbed, broken soul almost magically. In real life, that is not the case and walking in with this expectation is one of the mistakes people make in marriages.
4.

Although you cannot expect a relationship like marriage to fix you, but the purpose of marriage is to provide companionship and a lifelong friendship. It is possible that your partner is going through a rough patch, and needs your emotional support. If you don’t provide that support two of the following things will happen.
First, you will not be able to connect with your partner. Second, your partner might lean on a third person for emotional support. Which would result in the involvement of a third person which can absolutely destroy a marriage.
3.

Receiving love is one of the most basic emotional needs of a human being. We often assume that the people we love in our life know that we love them. However, not expressing love enough can make your partner feel not loved. On the contrary, expressing love keeps the marriage exciting and keeps your partner satisfied.
2.

Everybody has their quirks and their less appealing habits. Of course, we should try to grow and change your less appealing habits. However, having the expectation that your partner will change for you will destroy your marriage because of many reasons.
First, you are walking into the marriage with the wrong expectation. If a person has been a certain way their entire life, it’s very difficult to change for someone overnight. Even if they do change, the change will be temporary.
Therefore, you should try accepting them as they are and if you’re having serious compatibility issues, then it’s time to reevaluate your decisions.
1.

Perhaps the biggest of all mistakes people make is assuming that relationships like marriage don’t need constant work. It doesn’t matter if you were head over heels in love with each other, and never had an argument before.
When you’re living with someone all day every day, things are bound to get less glamorous. You will have arguments and you will get annoyed by each other’s little habits. That’s why it’s important to realize that to keep the marriage happy, exciting and fulfilling, you need to be able to put in considerable effort. Be playful with your partner, flirt with them and tease them. Be ready to do all the above and much more.
In conclusion, marriage can be one of the most beautiful and fulfilling relationships if you avoid certain mistakes and behaviors.